So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
4 words: hood of his car
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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