3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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