I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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