I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
