friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Do you have feelings for this penis?
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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