There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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