i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
