3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
