You can't motorboat a personality
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
