Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
