I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
