My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
