I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
