just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
