FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
