okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Randomize
