Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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