Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
please come you make the beer taste better
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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