I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Quick, to the slutcave!
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize