i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
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