i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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