Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
