I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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