Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
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