it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Randomize
