i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize