take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
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