Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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