There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
