Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
