Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
