hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize