I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
