Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
