I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
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