how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
