Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
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