Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
