i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
