Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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