Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
