He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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