i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize
