Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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