and you said cock pushups were impossible
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
It's just like the Real World with babies
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
