How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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