We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
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