it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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