Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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