RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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