So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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